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Revision

I was never correcty educated on how to revise a paper. I've been taught how to peer edit, correct drafts, and re-write papers. After reading about revision in my english book "Embracing Writing" I learned that revision is similiar to what I already learned how to do. Revision is simply re-arranging, adding, or replacing information to improve your work or create a totally new idea. Regardless revision is an easy step in your work and will improve the overall outcome or grade. It all begins with deciding what is not right with your paper then deciding how you want to change it. Choosing the right visuals and terms for your paper is important. I feel like revision is important to writing a paper so you are postive the end result is exactly what you'd hoped for. From now on after I write my drafts, and come up with what I think might be my end result, I will revise my papers to make sure they are done correctly and are in my eyes perfect.

A Twisted World

A Twisted World by James McMorrow Jr. is an interesting description of what the world would be like if we replaced all of our politicians with celebrities. The essay was well detailed providing good emamples and very entertaining as well. The thought of hollywood becoming our nation capital would be the day that pigs fly. I found the list of celebrities portrayed as our new presidential party most interesting. Although personally I would most likely place a man suc as Denzel Washington or Alec Balwin as president as opposed to the obnoxious Tom Cruise. I was surprised at the amount of laws that McMorrow suggested would be changed. It is quite inevitable that the obvious hollywood scene of marijuana and plastic surgury would be legal and in demand, the laws of DUI's being reduced and being forced to own an adopted child did not enlighten me. I disagree with the authors point and believe familes should have a choice to adopt or not to adopt, regardless of the cost. I also feel as though DUI's would increase more than drop and would need to be taken more seriously. Overall, however, I feel this essay was one of the more intriguing I have read.

Example from projects

John Rapp's project on his feelings about music was presented nicely. He constructed a good slideshow to show the timeline of what music meant to him. I liked the choice of music and the smiley faces he incorporated to show his mood. However, I felt like he was almost jumping around his timeline as if he started to play then just learned right away. He did a good job though, on expression. He wanted to show people, I think, how he used music almost as a way to find friends, but really to find himself. I agree with him that when you get involved in an extra corricular activity such as music or sports, it definitely makes you feel comfortable and find friends that you have something in common with. Job well done.

More than a bird, more than a plane

A baby sister added to a family of two sons was the perfect way to complete the Betty's. I was very young when I began to look up to my older brothers, especially Matheau. It began with copying everything he did, playing with legos, watching wrestling, and most importantly, soccer. Matheau taught me how to play soccer when I was a four and I've been playing at least two seasons a year ever since. All my life I've looked up to Matt and he was always my hero. That was, until he was fourteen and began smoking marijuana often. It was only the beginning of what would become a battle of to more serious addiction, changing his lifestlye, and throwing away oppurtunities he wouldn't get back. I watched him become an addict, and that taught me to live above the influence. I watched Matheau begin to fail out of school, and that taught me to excel in my academics completely junior and senior year with straight a's. I watched my brother fall and throw away everything. Watching my brother's downfall helped me to realize that I wanted better for myself, and through his mistakes I fix them in mine. When Matheau had his recovery, joined the service, and started a family it taught me that even when your at your low, there is always a way to go lower or higher. This project will be a video montage of how perfect life was for me and matheau when we were at the peak of our childhood. It will then show Matheaus downfall and how I benefited from it. Then it will end with Matheaus recovery, how his life impacted mine, and where we both are today. No matter what he does from now on he will always be my superman.